Hot, spicy boiled beef juice on my pants

So the other night, five out of seven in the Dee clan, hopped in the Lexus mom-mobile (You know the white SUV.) and drive 45-minutes to an authentic Asian hot pot restaurant.

If you’ve never been to one, you’re brought a big bowl of broth which heats-up and boils right on your table. You then receive raw veggies, meat, etc that you cook yourself in the broth. (Yay, I get to cook my own food and pay for it!)

Your fearless leader orders the spicy broth with a beef and fish combo. The broth arrives  but my broth fails to heat up. So I switch seats, the broth is moved to the heater in front of me and I wait for the magic moment when it boils.

The familia is already cooking their meats and slurping up the goodness while I wait. I’m not paying attention the liquid, which begins to boil, as liquid tends to do when heated at high temperatures.

It is not until a few minutes later I begin to feel a warm, wet seeping sensation on the crotch of my pants. When I look down I see a large wet stain that looks as if I had, well,  an “accident.”

You see the  broth had boiled over, streamed down the table and soiled my pants. Fortunately, by the time it reached my nether regions, it had cooled off – or I would have had a different story for you.

Our waitress noticed my predicament, I assured her I did not need to be wearing adult diapers, and she showed mercy on me by turning down my hot pot and showing me how to cook the food. Mind you, the procedure is pretty simple:

  1. Pick up whatever ever you want to cook.
  2. Drop it in the boiling broth.
  3. Remove whatever you put in.
  4. Eat it.

Not exactly rocket science but obviously, Mr. Foodie struggled mightily with the concept.

I won’t tell you the story of how a piece of boiling cabbage burned the heck out of the back of my throat, just suffice to say, this wasn’t one of my better dining experiences.

The moral of the story. None really other than that storytelling is an extremely important part of creating an engaging sales presentation and personal stories are the best.

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Kick butt, make mucho DEEnero

~Dave “Winner Of The Oddest Subject Line” Dee